Topics Include
The Decision
Why you definitely shouldn't become a parent in the first place
Why you're making a huge mistake
What were you thinking
Practical Tips Before Birth
How to get pregnant; turning sex into something dull and lifeless
Pregnancy Wine Guide
9 months of bliss; one woman's infuriatingly unrepresentative experience of pregnancy
Instant Regret
Who needs sleep; the first six months
The Toddler Years; A guide to making money on instagram by exploiting the cuteness of your child
Pre-school; An illustrated guide to making your partner do most of the work
Creeping Realisation
Primary School age; The best -drug free- Years of Their Life
High School; How to apply for Special Consideration
Will they ever move out- A Guide to your child's 20s and 30s
The Resentment Years
Middle-Age; Why everything wrong with their lives is your fault
Also included a bonus do-it-yourself Last Will and Testament to let you cut your children out of their inheritance in 3 easy steps
