In this haunting and frank account, Donna Ford, bestselling author of The Step Child, returns to the horrific abuse she suffered at the hands of her stepmother. As a tiny girl of five, and for six long years, Donna was physically, mentally and sexually abused. She was starved, beaten and 'loaned out' to neighbours who raped and molested her ...and throughout her father stood by and did nothing. When her stepmother finally left the family home, Donna dreamed of a normal childhood in which she would be taken care of by the man who had, up until this point, failed her. But it was not to be. By telling the whole story of her Edinburgh childhood, Donna tries to understand why the man who should have loved her the most - her own father - was the one who deceived her the most, by continuing to allow men to abuse her. Instead of finding a future of love and happiness, Donna was once again thrust into a living nightmare of exploitation and betrayal by those who should have wrapped her up in their love. Abandoned by her real mother when she was tiny, we also learn of Donna's efforts to find the woman who might have made such a difference to her childhood, and the terrors she has gone through as an adult, if she had stayed. Most astonishing of all is the journey we take with Donna to discover the woman she has become: a devoted mother of three and a talented artist and writer. While this is a story of the appalling physical, mental and emotional abuse inflicted on Donna, it is also a tale of how exhilaration, tenderness and self-development can flourish despite childhood horrors.