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    What Rhymes With Bastard?

    By: Linda Robertson

    Date Released

    Out of Print

    'What rhymes with "bastard"?

    •mastard...mastered? Nope
    •parstard – plastered? Plastered!

    That's it! This is the story of how a very nice boyfriend became a plastered bastard and how I wrote some songs about it.'

    This is also the story of how Linda and Alan fell madly in love, moved to San Francisco and got married for Green Card purposes; of how they got crap jobs and lived like squatters in a house overpopulated by weirdoes; of how they (Linda) issued an embargo on anal sex until Alan quit smoking and how they (Alan) decided it was time to take their marriage to the next level – an open relationship – while Linda bought a cat.

    Funny and sad, 'What Rhymes with Bastard?' is about an English girl abandoned by her husband, surrounded by surreal friends, and in search of the ultimate musical accolade: Ms Accordion San Francisco 2004.

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